230509

Enough.

What is enough?

I guess you could carve out enough as being of ample provision. If something is enough, it will satisfy your immediate need. 

Quench your thirst. 

Enough is an amount. 

So last Thursday I went to a worship and prayer evening at Westborough URC in Guildford with a guy called Sean Feucht from an organisation/movement called Burn 24/7 (http://burn24-7.com).

For me? It was amazing. Ever since that night, I have been changed...because I was in His presence...the courts of the King.

I started the night praying something that had been coming out whenever I had been writing in the approaching days of wanting a glimpse of God. Wanting to touch the hem of his garment and have a face to face encounter with Him who was and is and is to come. 

And you know how you start a night of worship with something in mind and God fulfills that in a completely different way to that which you would expect. When I think of a face to face encounter I think of seeing in my minds eye, in my spirit what Jesus looks like.

But what ended up happening for me, I think was an encounter of the heart of God. Having a revelation of just who God is and responding to the call that is upon myself and the Church as His sons and daughters.

There was a part in the evening where Sean started singing about God being more than enough. And as all 50 or so of us (some more acclimatised to the stylings of worship than others) joined in on that I started in my own space to pray out loud about God. About how He is more than enough. About how he can change a nation. A continent. This planet. In a whole day should he so choose. 

He can make the most scarlet of garments appear white as snow.  He can take a persons broken heart and restore it. 

He is more than enough to restore love and worth and identity to the 18 year who sells her body in the night in slavery. 

He is more than enough to change this city. Our city. Any city.

More than enough to shine in the darkness and poverty that lies on our doorstep.

It almost breaks my head when I think of it. 

I have more than this to say. But it's still rebounding my head and I can't wuite make sens of it just yet.

So until then.

It was a Saturday night when I first heard it...we started at 8pm.
In one of the top rooms at the Guildford Baptist Centre where numerous men and women young or old from around our fair city had spent in prayer that week. 
We went in not just to spend time in prayer, but to spend time in worship. You know those times when you get together and worship just for the sake of worship? Those times when you come just to pour perfume upon the Saviours feet...to lavish all that we are upon all that He is. 
It was one of those.
I think it was after some light catch up conversation and discussion of what everyone was feeling in the air, that we listened to this track. This track that I know some of you have heard. The 22 minute monster from IHOP that asks 'Do you know the way that you move me?'.
If you haven't already heard it, then you should. 

I've been fortunate enough to have some time off this Easter. Last week, I went and met my first nephew, William David Norton Cornall...who is soon to be joined by another nephew or neice. On Tuesday I went for a walk...kinda like Forrest Gump went for a run. I discovered some woods not too far from where I lodge on Monday and so liked them that I went to explore some more on Tuesday. It was just one of those days where I got to the top of one hill and wanted to find another hill that went higher so I ended up walking 10 miles.
Anyway.
On my train journeys and on the numerous little rambles I have taken this week I have been listening to that track. 
Each time I listen to it, I go back to the question of whether or not it is actually possible for me to move the heart of God. To stir God's heart. 
I mean what have I got that could do that?

I think that each one of us has the capability to move the heart of God. We each have the capacity either, in prayer or worship or in compassion, the ability to move and stir the heart of God. 
I find it astounding that whilst God was knitting me together in the womb of my mother, that he would be placing the things that move my heart in there aswell. The things that I love in life, God put them there. 
So he knows what moves me. He knows that there is no other place that I would rather be than in His courts, singing songs of praise to Him. He knows that I long to see rivers of living water flow amongst his people. And that I would be lost without all He has done for me. 
There is so much more.

My point being. 
That when we seek God in the light of something He has placed upon our hearts, surely we can move Him. Surely if we ask Him to render the heavens and come down, He will. 

The idea of being able to move the heart of God for me is quite mind blowing...because it suggests that God would care about who I am. 

In Jesus, my hope is cast.
May the hope of the Saviour hold strong for all my days.
For the call of Christ is so strong and intriguing, what reason would I have to pass it up or ignore?
For far greater is the Saviour that is in me than those the world offers me.
In Jesus, my hope is not disappointed. 
My heart can never be cast down.
For He is king of all and the Saviour of my soul.
He is my very cause.
My very reason.
All of my days.

The first love

You are Alpha and Omega

We worship you our Lord

You are worthy to be praised.

We give you all the glory

We worship you our Lord

You are worthy to be praised.

010508

So I've been thinking. 

I'm sorry, I just can;t help it at times. For example, I was lying in bed for 2 hours trying to sleep. In the end I had to switch the bedside lamp on and empty my head before I could even think of resting my head.

But today was another matter. I arrived back in Melbourne after a couple of days away in New Zealand. Something that hit me whilst in an Auckland Internet cafe was this:

'God, give us your heart is a very dangerous prayer.'

Might not come as much of a surprise to many of you but this generation is writing this into their songs and praying it into their prayers. 

I have a theory about this that I have constructed in one afternoon. So there may well be loopholes and gaps which you intellectuals want to poke it...not my problem.

So my thinking is that the generation of christians that I belong to in the western world are emerging from what I think has perhaps been a confusing time for the church (again, please be reminded that these are just my thoughts). We've had the rise in popularity of the mega-church, the prosperity gospel and lots of other teaching claiming 'you'll be rich if you give us yer money', and the gospel according to positive thinking. 

I think that this generation are reacting. We are. We are the reaction generation. We are the 'who gives a fcuk' generation. Atleast I know that I am. 

And we are very much hungering for something more. We are thirsty for substance and danger and a live that captures our attention. If you're going to live and die for a cause, it may as well be on that you believe in with all your mind, body, heart and soul. The Vision and the Vow by Pete Greig is an amazing book. I truly wish that I had got my head into that book years ago...I still haven't managed to finish it, but the Vision that Pete bases the book around is truly inspiring and makes my heart pound. 

I listen to alot of worship music and am hearing more and more songs about justice and the breaking of our hearts for that which breaks God's heart. 

It's almost a prayer of remorse. That we're saying 'God, we're sorry that our hearts aren't broken for the least of these...Break them we pray.' 

I have prayed some pretty outrageous things in the last few years and am now getting the answers. I would pray things about love. About the fact that our love in our lives is and should be a direct response to the love that christ showed on the cross.  I have prayed that I will go wherever God sends me. That I will sing whatever God puts on my heart to sing. That I will go to the ends of the earth for love. 

And you know what? 

I wouldn't have it any other way. I know that by praying outrageous things, I am going to get trying and outrageous answers to prayer and that my living out that response to prayer may not be easy, or comfortable or seem to make sense to some people, but I will never be able to turn around later and say 'what if...'

God, I never want to be able to ask the question 'what if...'. I mean sometimes it's inevitable...but I don't want to if I don't have to.

That is all.

Starbucks

Just sitting in Starbucks.

I missed out on an opportunity to say hello to some people I know that God wanted me to talk to. You know how I missed this? Because I didn't to look like an idiot. I hate when that happens. I hate when I ignore the voice of God. That's the worst thing.

Connect group here I come.

What can wash away my sin?

What can make me whole again?

Nothing but the blood of Jesus. 

The blood of Jesus.

Is it just me or are there aspects and concepts within Christianity that we have to constantly refamiliarise ourselves with. I guess thats what was meant when Paul instructed that we should constantly engaging in the renewal of our minds. 

And I don't think that comes through listening to some music or by just sitting down and waiting for God to place a tablet of stone in your lap with the answers. That's my figurative attitude by the way. But I guess you could say that Christianity requires more of you than your time. It requires your heart, your dreams, your love - all of which I believe God placed within us for his glory to start with. 

It's like life is the playing out of this diverse and ever changing relationship between us and God. God pursues us through life...and he never gives up. 

Would it be right to call us brothers and sisters in Christ the carriers of the pursuit?...if that makes sense. We carry the love of God that seeks the lost, the hurting, the lonely, the orphaned, the poor. We are the carriers of justice and all that is right.

That is why I pray 'Break my heart for what breaks yours'. That is why I desperately want to understand the ways and intricacies of Gods love. 

But I'm just getting back to a place where that's possible...and I've got Australia in 5 weeks. Which if I'm really honest...I cannot wait for. I hope that I can find God...it's like God hides in different countries for different people. Or that you just feel more at ease and more open to the voice of God when you are goodness knows how many thousand miles away from working nights, worrying about where you are meant to go to church and constantly trying to analyse your own mind and thoughts.

Maybe...just maybe...I can disconnect from those pressures. 

Please...let me disconnect from those pressures for those 5 weeks and get the perspective and revelation that you know I need.

(Listening to: Hillsong United - The I Heart Revolution: With Hearts as One) 

I just ate like...2/3rds of a loaf of bread...

AntiValentines

You knew it was coming didn't you?...I mean honestly...you knew it was coming. 

The one where I get on here and give you my 2 cents on love. And being single. 

And how my opinion matters. 

This is the 4th year that I have been single...and the 6th consecutive one that I have not been with anyone on valentines day. It's just another day though isn't it. You rush down in the morning having laid wide eyed in your bed praying that you'll get a card from someone. It's the kind of hope that you stash in a cupboard...you know the kind of thing that you get and you put in the bottom drawer of your wardrobe to keep it out of sight and out of mind. But every so often when there is no-one else in the house, you'll run up to your room, close all the doors although no-one is due home from work for a good couple of hours and check that what you stowed away is still safe. 

That's the kind of hope that lies in my heart. It's a kind of 'I'm fine with life and where everything is going' but on the days when I'm on my own and all the doors are closed I start to wonder...is all of this ok with me?

I heard something on an album I was listening to today whilst sauntering around town before starting night 10 of 12 and some preacher guy said this: 'The opportunity of a lifetime should be seized in the lifetime of the opportunity'.

I'll just give you a minute to work that out because I've been listening to that album for the last 3 years and only just understood that today.

....

Got it yet?

So how many opportunities have I passed up? How many opportunities of a lifetime have I given up on? How many people of a lifetime have I missed out on?

I don't know. Truth is I'm still working through everything. Although I feel I've had the most normal weekend this weekend gone for months. This is the final week of living at the university and sleeping while no-ones at home. Maybe I'll spend some time looking through that which I have stowed away in my heart and re-evaluating whether or not I should keep it stowed away.

You heard the story of the guys and the talents that were given to them? And by talents I mean biblical money stuffs. 

The guy that went out and buried his incurred wrath of the investor. So what does that mean? Perhaps that rather than worrying about ability and worth, I should be available. At least trying to do that which I know is in my heart to do. 

How does any of this tie in with valentines day? It doesn't really. All I know is that I'm probably going to end up going to my dinner reservation on my own. Which if I'm completely honest with you about, I'm fine with. I'm not worried about being single. I'm not worried that it's been 4 years since I was with someone. Because I know that my heart is to know and love God. So I want to spend time reading and studying the Bible. And that is what I'm trying to do. And believe me...I need help with that. From God to help me concentrate and to reveal the secrets of his word to me throughout. 

Another day...another night shift.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

I'll be honest with you. Because I think honesty is important.

I am scared. 

Now let me be clear. 

I am not after fame or recognition. That I have always maintained. That when it comes to worship music be it leading or playing in a worship band, I do not seek the worship of man but to I am seeking to bring glory to you. 

I am scared that I will never find the place in which I can get the songs that have so often been prophesied to be within me, out. 

I enjoy writing music. But I'm sure as I have often said to you or written to you, I have no idea what to say. It at first seems like such a simple thing. 

The problem I have is knowing that I have the ability and character to do that which I have been asked. But as I've wrestled with before, I know that you don't have to be ready to start something. You don't have to be perfect before you can be used in amazing ways. 

I just ask that in the coming weeks and days and months that I can find a home. A place where I find healing and a new understanding of you.

Something that has come into my heart recently is this: I do not mind if I never get to satisfy the human desires of performance as long as I can understand how to love and worship you God.

Give me Love

I've been listening to a lot of Coldplay as of late. Especially the album 'Rush of  Blood To The Head'. Kinda just basking in the expanse of those songs. 

Thinking and dreaming about songs. 

About the songs in me.

I've been contemplating God and his whereabouts.

I've been witnessing events unfold in dreams and desperately searching for what God is trying to say. 

I've walked along cliffs and doused my fears in mud letting speeding winds...speed me along.

I've heard some talks over the last 2 weeks regarding faith. And how important faith is.

Faith in what? 

The people you love? 

The book you love? 

It's words?

What is it so important to have faith in?

Faith is a twofold concept.

On one hand you have faith in God. That is the faith that people talk about the most. Religious faith. The Jewish faith. The Muslim faith.

Then I think that faith can be explained as your belief system. If you say something challenges your faith does it challenge the fact that you have faith, believe in God and what he says or does it question your belief system? The way your christianity, your life is built up.

Recently I made a decision. And in all honesty it has been really quite hard. But I have to have faith that it is God who has guided me to where I am and that it is he who indeed directs my steps.

And that is proving to be one hard exercise. 

I am elsewhere in my head. 

God, grant me rest.

You Alone

I would like to say that I am one who likes to make up his own mind. When it comes to music or a book or perhaps even a film...I would like to say that I am capable of reliably making up my own mind and determining my own opinion.
Like I said....I would like to say.
I don't read many journalistic review supplements or columns so I am into what I see. You might then say that I am missing out on some of the great underground stuff. The sordid creations of the rebellious. The sheer beautiful creations of the suppressed.

Where am I going with this?

Last night contrary to journalistic...desire I guess, I watched Bruce Almighty's weedy cousin - Evan Almighty.

As is with most sequels, the plot was pretty much paper thin and rather sub-par in comparison to the braver more extravagant Bruce Almighty.
However as with those sub-par sequels, if you look hard enough, you can find the little nuggets that are worth writing about or putting on your fridge as a 'thought of the day' as such.
You know what I mean. The kind of thought that says something about disarming your enemies by being their friend. Stuff that you keep coming back to through the day.

So what exactly, I hear you ask, is the part of Evan Almighty that stuck in my mind so?

I shall tell you.

Roughly 40 minutes (1/2 way through the film), Evans wife leaves him after he leaves work and does the seemingly crazy by broadcasting the fact that God has told him to build an ark (or Act of Random Kindness). A mistake if you are a newly appointed congressman in the United States Government right? I mean...who listens to God in the mainstream world these days?
;)
So yeah...the rather attractive middle aged wife leaves her seemingly deranged husband with the kids. Then God, I mean Morgan Freeman, I mean God turns up for little conversation and brings out these gems of wisdom...or something to this effect.

If someone asks for patience, would you give them the immediate patience, or would you give them the opportunity to grow that patience on their own?

I must admit...poor job on the quoting...but the point is there.

How many times have you asked God for patience, joy, love, healing, or faith and then been pretty much immediately disappointed because all you saw was a crappy situation you had to work through.
I know that when I have prayed for those things, I will ask for them then have quite a hard time where (in hindsight I can see that) I had to exercise the very thing I was asking God for.
Whenever I prayed for faith, I would have a busy week like no other and have to totally rely on the knowledge that God would bring me through.
As I can guess when you pray for love. You may endure a situation where you have to learn the ways of the very thing which you ask God for.

I don;t know what my point was in all of this. My head is all over the place I must admit...but that's all for another day.

Love love love.

Dan xx

Is how it goes

Classic.

The other guy syndrome.

No matter how much you think you're winning, someone else wins. Someone who should win. Someone who is more right than you. But that doesn;t stop your hopes from being dashed does it?

That doesn't stop you from wondering about what you could've changed or done differently does it?

Really really...

If I'm honest?

I'm dying to meet you.

Here is Love

Here is Love.

As vast as oceans deep.
As wide as open valleys.
This is Love.

Love victorious.
Love courageous.
Love strong.
Love that never ends.

Love that casts away hurt and pain.
Love that searches through the depths of a mans heart
Love that knitted you together in your mothers womb.

Love that has been where I have been,
is with me now,
and knows where I am going.

This is Love.

Love that finds the lost.
That cares for the lonely and comforts those in need.

This is Love.

Love that stretches its arms as far as the east is from the west.
Love that signed a new covenant.
A Love that bears the weight of the world and hears its prayers day after day.

Love that gave blood, sweat and tears.
That overcame temptation and the grave.
That once and for all declared

'IT IS FINISHED'

This is the Love I know.

The Love I give.

The Love I have.

This is Jesus.

Do your clouds stop his voice?

Hearts aren't really our guides.
We are truly alone.
'Cause God ain't up in the sky,
Holding together our bones.

Remember we used to speak.
Now I'm starting to think,
Your voice was really my own,
Bouncing off the ceiling back to me.

God, this can't be.
God, this can't be,
God, could it be that all we see is it?

Won't you come down, heaven.
Won't you come down?
Won't you cut through the clouds?
Won't you come down?
(Did your clouds stop his voice?)

Oh, my heaven, why do you have doors to close?
Do you have clouds to stop his voice?

God, this can't be.
God, this can't be,
God, could it be that all we see is it?

God, does grace reach to this side of madness?
'Cause I know this can't be,
The great peace we all seek.

Come down, heaven.
Won't you come down?
Won't you cut through the clouds?
Won't you come down?

As Cities Burn - Contact

Have...

...you ever met someone who is part of everything you wanted to be part of and everything you wanted to be?

Have you ever wished for a life less ordinary?

Have you ever endured a frustration that you can do nothing to change?

This is one of those things that will work out in time.

Wishing life on a desert island was an option.

Why?

This is just an exploration for my spirit. I’m in the midst of writing a song of which the chorus presently goes like this:

‘O Lord,

We come to you,

With praises on our hearts,

Praises on our hearts.’

And abstractly, I think that to write a full song about the praises of God that come from my heart I need to understand just why it is that I praise God.

So that leads me to the question, why do we praise someone/thing?

When would it be appropriate to praise a child or loved one?

Why on earth would we praise God?

Because of all that he’s done, all that is doing and all that he will do. Because he is the same yesterday, today and forever. Because he sent his son, he sent love for me and the entirety of humanity.

Why do you go on a Sunday morning to sing songs to God? How do you determine whether or not someone is worthy of praise?

I talk about someone/thing - I mean God.

Surely, as the people of God…or any monarch, principality or power, we should praise that which we declare is sovereign over us?

So it would then be fair so put as point 1, that we praise God because it is our duty. It is our privilege through rain or shine to lift up our ruler. Our provider.

God is the creator of all things. I think it ties in with point 1, with God being sovereign, I think that we praise God because that is what he made us for. And in my mind there is no greater act for the collective body of God to do than to come together and raise their voices and spirits in agreement, lifting up the name of God.

 

Back to the root question, Why praise God?

Why would you come to God with praise? I think as much as anything else that we say to God, he hears our praises. Just as Matt Redman wrote in the song Blessed Be Your Name, ‘You give and take away, you give and take away, but still my heart will say, Lord, Blessed be your name’.

Because the praises and prayers (which I think go hand in hand) mixed with faith moves God. I think that when his people respond earnestly both individually and corporately, then God hears that. God will hear the one heartfelt, whisper of a cry amongst a barrage of clanging cymbals.

God is the same yesterday and forever. As is all that he has done for us. Those saved and unsaved. His mercies endure forever.

 

Which leads me to ask, what exactly is it that God has done for me?

I guess I’ll tackle the biblical things first.

God has given me salvation – a term which I think perhaps used rather carelessly these days and a topic which is seemingly larger than I at first may have estimated.

Salvation as I understand it is the ballpark are of what Jesus has done for me. Well ok, let me refine that…it is what is given to me through what Jesus has done for me. It is the gift of eternal life and right-standing with God the Father.

And through salvation, I have been given the gift of the Holy Spirit. The same spirit that lives in Christ, lives in me. The Holy Spirit is an immense tool and resource that as a Christian I have access to. With the Spirit of God comes power, healing (all sorts of healing – both physical and emotional), creativity, dreams & visions, insight into the word of God and so much more.

Isaiah 53 speaks of what the death of the saviour of the world will do hundreds and hundreds of years before the birth of Christ. One particular part of the passage I want to focus in on is that which says ‘…and by his stripes, we are healed…’. I believe this applies to both emotional and physical healing. The stripes of Christ, the wounds he suffered which were rightfully mine, break the back of the sin and pain that I may feel or endure.

Saviour of the World

In a random way...I still live in Christian city. And it's giving me a headache...the books...they're a paragraph on their own.

So thus beginneth my rant.

Ok...this isn't a rant. This is a headache.

This is a tired 22 year old watching the last disc of season 5 of 24.

With countless books sprawled across his mess of a room marked 2, 3, or 4 chapters in. Some are even audaciously marked at chapter 10/14...but very very few actually finished.

Just what is it that I'm trying to achieve? What is it that I'm putting off from doing?

I have a job...I am a worship leader...I am a bass player...

What do I want to be? What do I want to become?

I understand that the whole thing is a journey yadda yadda yadda.

But you know what I kinda feel like I have another useless analogy for where I am in life...and for what is going on in my head. It's one that I'm sure you have seen and heard many a time.

So this weekend gone, my housemate and I decide on an impromptu road trip to the sweet sweet city of Paris.
We leave at 230am Saturday morning and drive to Dover...Hop on a Euro Tunnel train £98 lighter and sleep our way into Calais. We drive for an hour or so seducing the sun to rise sweetly as we carve our way south on the wrong side of the road.
So we stop, we have a coffee, we sleep, then we continue au droit into sweet Paris.

So some road, a couple of toll booths, and a big French stadium pass.

We walk 7 miles (approx) from car park to Eiffel Tower passing through Hindu districts and red light districts, stopping off at 'authentic' art dealers, a rustic cafe where our disability to speak or understand French becomes inherently clear.

SO...long story short.

We walk back another 7 miles to the car and attempt to drive out and find a public house that will serve us some chilled refreshments and allow us to watch the reason we drove (well Dave drove...I 'copiloted'...but that's another story) goodness knows how many hundreds of miles.

So we walk out of the pub post Rugby with our tails between our legs and blisters nagging away at our ankles.

And thus begins the avid search. For our way home. The road bearing the name A1...and thus turning into E15.
Sounds simple enough right?
You could NOT be more wrong.
We then seem to endure what seems to be roughly a 90 minute detour, frustrated exchanges of words debating what turnoffs we should or should not have taken, and the French Police. By God these guys don't like English tourists. Or tired English sportsfans who try and race through an 'amber' light. Last time we try that on the continent.

But it was all fine. We got on the A1 eventually and got back on the train, and slept...I think I owe it to Dave to make it known that I sacrificed the last change we had on a Cappuccino...for myself.
In my defence...Dave was having a quick kip...and my logic led me to believe that he would get sufficient restoration from 15 minutes of light napping...

Being tired can do that to you.

So all in all...a wonderful adventure I assure you - we both got back in time to play music at church and spent our Sunday afternoons on sofas sleeping the whole thing off.

My point.

Is that you know where you want to go. In your head. But your experience at your destination can be rushed, tiring, and can even give you blisters on your feet because you park the car an unusually far distance from where you actually want to go.
My focus is our journey out.
You see I would like to wager that had we stayed in a hostel somewhere and not tried to race back for Sunday morning then we wouldn;t have got lost. We wouldn't have taken the same detour along the A86 and A3 (there is one in Paris...imagine just how sweet it would've been if we had stumbled upon a teleportation road that took us straight back to Guildford...one can only dream...) and I know that I wouldn't have spent 2 hours of the journey punching Dave and asking him stupid questions in a last ditch effort to keep him awake.
Yes I saw a Petrol station on the way home...but I thought it would be funny to see what sleep deprivation did to the driver of a car obviously.

Though life can be likened to a journey somewhere or a road trip that we are all seemingly on, if we do not take the appropriate time out, we end up making rash decisions, the same mistakes repeatedly and we waste time. Time that could be spent elsewhere more effectively.

Does that make sense?

I think it will...and I know it's an analogy that has many times been explained.

The heart behind it is that I'm tired and I need to sleep it off. I need to recover. I need to take back the parts of my heart that have been chipped away over months of work and no rest.

And I do not think that it is ever a bad thing to do those things.

But it's just finding the time right?...


Ironic no?

x x

Bless this mess

I kinda don;t know what it is that I want to say this morning.
I woke sharply this morning after a good refreshing 8 hours sleep.

I just spent the last 56 minutes perched on my windowsill anticipating the rising of the sun. Finally figuring that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. That's the right way round isn't it?

I watched Garden State last night. Now..I'm no cinematography analyst but that film was not very good. I mean sure...it painted a wonderful picture of the boy who felt nothing because his grouch of a father put him on medication and sent him away...but I'm sorry...the whole thing was just quite nothingy.
I mean the bit where he kisses Natalie Portman? Not convinced.

I guess I am just still in a weird place.

I understand that alot of what I'm typing is just going to come across as cryptic nonsense and unless you know me that's what it will remain.

I'm confused by the presence of God. By what it is. By what ushers it into a place. Is it the heart of one man? The collective heart of many? Or is it the sound that rises up from a place?
I personally don;t think that God is moved by a sound. I don;t think that God cares about how polished something looks. He cares about the heart with which we bring what we have be it amazing or terrible.

Imagine this:

A 4 year old child arrives home at 1130am having spent the last 2 and a half hours in nursery. It gives mum a break while she nurses the newborn and dad is at the office paying the bills and keeping the roof over their heads.
Now the 4 year old comes home having spent a good hour of the morning painting a picture of the family. As 4 year olds go, this painting is going to be their impression of the family. It's their heart on canvas.
The child presents the picture to mum and what do you think her reaction will be?

'Oh sorry...You really think I'm going to put that anywhere on public display? That's hardly presentable for people to see. That's going straight into a drawer'

or

That's amazing! Who's that?...and how long did it take you? This is going straight up on the fridge you little artist.'

Ok so here's the point I guess I'm trying to get out.

Does God really give a damn about the quality of what we give? I think that yes, it is important to give our best to God, but not at the price of our hearts. If you sacrifice the heart behind something then it might as well not be done.
The reason I sing praise to God is because I love him. I pray and I pray and I pray that it never becomes a chore. That singing praises to God never becomes void of any heart on my behalf.
I guess I am just privately questioning the reason behind some things that I put so much into.

I'll leave you with this:

God, I would much rather sing as a child draws than to paint as a superstar plays. Strike any pride from within me and keep me humble I pray.

Does that make sense?

Seeing Clearly

I was reading my bible notes this morning before I began some work from the home office... and we've finished the lil stint in the Psalms which was cool.
Now it's onto the centre of life as such - Jesus.

Mark 8 v 22-26

Think of how you first came to Jesus. Think of the people who led you to him.

I am now going to skip out a big chunk of content from the study guide and just go onto the questions at the end of todays notes.

Where is your focus today?

Is your mind consumed by your problems, or are you looking to Jesus?

Only he can set us free to worship God, only he can give is a new perspective.

I am praying for his perspective. I am praying for his heart. I am praying that I can just learn to 'be'. I think about things too much..as some of you may well know. But I think I need to think less about things...and learn to be. I think that when you learn to be relaxed - in your esteem and with who you are, then there's great power found...because there's a clear line of sight.
The response section of the notes talks about allowing my problems to take their rightful place - in the hands of God.

So in an attempt to see more clearly, I am imposing a fast as such. I am not going to be on myspace until Monday. That's...4 days. I shall be fasting all food until Sunday dinner time in the evening.
During this time, I'm praying for church, our pastor, the worship which I'm leading on Sunday and the things that are upon my heart.

My chains are gone I've been set free,
My God my Saviour has ransomed me,
And like a flood his mercy rains,
Amazing Love, Amazing Grace.

I will be on txt and my mobile.

Big love to the whole world.

Dan x x